The reason the work you’ve done on how you feel doesn’t seem like it’s working is because you need to do it until it works. It’s never been “this strategy will pull you up” it’s always been “here’s something you can do that will END with you getting out of that hole” the climbing still hurts and the being underground still hurts but that doesn’t mean it’s not working
*doing laundry* “this doesn’t feel better
*cooking meals* this doesn’t feel better
*exercising* this doesn’t feel better
*making art* this doesn’t feel better
*cleaning the apartment* this doesn’t feel better
*somewhere months or years down the line*
holy shit
tl;dr
Look at a stone cutter hammering away at his rock, perhaps a hundred times without as much as a crack showing in it. Yet at the hundred-and-first blow it will split in two, and I know it was not the last blow that did it, but all that had gone before.
Jacob Riis
I think an important thing to remember, too, is that you’re not done once you get to that point of feeling better. It takes maintenance and consistency. Sort of similar to how you shouldn’t stop taking your meds when you start feeling better–that’s because of the meds. You shouldn’t stop your self-care when you start feeling better. That’s exactly when you need it the most!
I remember the first time I saw it, i stared at it for several minutes until I finally just started crying. It made me resolve to leave, and I turned in my resignation about a month later.
This is your reminder that if life keeps throwing you lemons you are not morally obligated to make lemonade from them. You can duck, or catch them in a trash can, or get a baseball bat and slam those fuckers into the stratosphere.
